Tuesday 27 May 2008

My Favourite Things

Boys in pink jumpers and digital pictures
Free drinks at launches and cheap cocktail pitchers
Hadouken! and Kate Nash and The Ting Tings
These are a few of my favourite things

Dancing in nightclubs with stamps on my arm
Shag bands and bracelets and glitter lip balm
Falling in love and ten minute flings
These are a few of my favourite things

Pulling and snogging and going on dates
Ordering wine and getting shit-faced
Eyeliner, hair wax and gay angel wings
These are a few of my favourite things

When the love bites, and the cut stings
When I’m feeling sad
I simply remember my favourite things
And then I don't feel so bad

Thursday 22 May 2008

End of an era

Today, me and the ex-boyfriend finally closed our joint account. 9 months after we split up.
It was totally amicable, but today was super weird.

Well, it's a new dawn, it's a new day.

Wednesday 14 May 2008

Lovely Nina Pin-up Girl

In the pub last night Nina said the loveliest thing. We were talking about a bloke who everyone thinks is hot (including me) and she said she really couldn't see it, she thought I was hot and if I was straight she'd fancy me. Aww, Nina is really good for my self esteem, and if I was straight we would make a hot couple, as this picture illustrates:



I really have to get Jacqui and Nina together, I think they would make an AMAZING double act!

Friday 9 May 2008

Last nite

The Grand Adventures of Nina & Andy - Part III

The usual Thursday night wasabi nuts in 33... you know how it goes, we met Jonny and Julian and some lovely people who like to shoot deer and eat game. Yum. Then on the way to my house (quick stop to change clothes) Nina gets attacked on the road. We were egged! Some dirty chavs in a driveby egging, driving some shit car down Sanquar Street. Cunts.

My house, eating cold chicken, taxi to Canton... brandy and coke, then I made Nina's lunch and played with the cat then back into town for gays and cocktails.


I never need to go back to Exit bar, like James says: Exit is deader than corduroy these days.

So that's it, Part III and we all survived. Saw Nina's belly today (where the egg struck), there's a red mark.

Take heed, egg bastards, we'll get you. We always get you in the end.

Tuesday 6 May 2008

Another bloody questionnaire

1. What is your middle name? Craig
2. How big is your bed? Double
3. What are you listening to right now? The cars swooshing past my window in work
4. What are the last 4 digits in your mobile phone number? 8117
5. What was the last thing you ate? A sugar free mint
6. Last person you hugged? Simon
7. How is the weather right now? Gloriously sunny
8. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Nina
9. The first thing you notice about the sex (that you fancy)? Face
10. Favourite type of Food? French, Italian, game, seafood, tapas, cake
11. Do you want children? Yes, I'd love to have kids
12. Hair colour?
Dark brown
13. Do you wear contacts? Nope, 20/20
14. Favourite holiday? Prague
15. Favourite Season? Autumn
16. Have you ever cried over a love lost? Oh constantly
17. Last movie you watched? Aliens
18. What books are you reading? Watership Down by Richard Adams, Toby's Lie by Daniel Vilmure, and Deathly Hallows by JK Rowling (again)
19. Piercings? Yep, 12. Ears (6) lip (2), tongue, nips (2) and belly button
20. Favourite Movie? I can't say Star Wars, that's cheating, so I will say Pan's Labyrinth
21. Favourite football team? Favourite what?
22. What were you doing before filling this out? Trying to recruit volunteers in Amman Valley School
25. Favourite animal? Dogs, wolves, frogs, unicorns, dragons, lolcats
26. Favourite drink? Pop
27. Favourite flower?
Daffs
28. Have you ever loved someone? Of course
29. Who would you like to see right now? Seriously? A beer garden. With a certain someone waiting in it with a cold beer for me!
30. What colour are your bedroom walls? Bloody magnolia
31. Have you ever fired a gun? Yes
32. Do you like to travel by plane? Nah
33. Right-handed or Left-handed? Right
34. If you could go to anywhere right now where would you go? See question 29
35. Are you missing someone? Kind of, it's complicated
36. Do you have a tattoo?
Yeah loads
37. Do you still watch cartoons on Saturday mornings? I never stopped!
38. Are you hiding something from someone right now? Nope, I am secret free
39. Are you 18? In my head, I'm only 15
40. What is the wallpaper on your mobile phone?
An old fashioned clock, with hands
41. Are you afraid of the dark? Yes, sometimes

42. Favourite hangout? Bar 33
43. 3 things you can't live without? Creating things, music, friends, cake, er, that's 4 I know!
44. Favourite songs? The Hidden Cameras - Hump From Bending, Bearsuit - Shhh Get Out, Suede - Where The Pigs Don't Fly.
45. What are you afraid of? Zombies, spiders, the dark, being alone, the sea... the list is endless
46. Are you a giver or a taker? How rude! Lol. I give of myself too much I think
47. What are your nicknames? Andy, Sandshoe, Fflwcs
48. What is your dad's middle name? Wyn
49. What do you sleep in? Jamas when it's cold, pants when it's not
50. Stuck on a deserted island, and can only bring one thing? Sewing machine, I'd make clothes out of the leaves
51. Favourite TV commercial? The one for a car where the man slams the door in time to the music
52. First thing you'll save in a fire? My computer, then keyboard, ukulele and 303
53. What is your favourite colour? Blue
54. What are the things you always bring with you? Lipsalve, mp3 player, phone, paper and pens, banana, diary
55. What did you want to be when you were a kid? A chef
56. What do you usually do when the alarm turns on? Press snooze
57. What colour is your bedsheet? Navy
58. Who do you want to meet? Prince Charming
59. What do you think about before you go to bed? See question 45

A 21st Century Galatea for gay boys

A tell-tale sign of movement. Black plastic. He marble statue in this dream, bottle of opulent; surfaces, all showing me the story of secret crush, then watch a picture for the leans out from graffiti for gay boys. I white wine has velvet drapes and shiny as my life. Waking and messaging. I dream the lips. Eyes glaze beneath come to life. We drink cold beer. The room is his reflection. Always. That is tardis. Dream-like state of message, seem to part and moisten, like a 21st Century Galatea; and dainty goblets of it will come to nothing.

Saturday 3 May 2008

Antiville (lite)

The pain ills.
We take the pills
ingnore the thrills.
This time the cars crash
the lights flash.
We all go down.

We all go down
in the end.
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